Monday, July 20, 2009

Confession

I'm the kind of person who likes to talk. I like to get things off my chest and always feel better after 'fessing up to something. It's possible that I was the only little catholic girl who actually enjoyed going to the confessional at church when I was younger. Not that I ever had a lot to confess, it was just the usual childish disclosures of telling white lies, stealing a penny from my mother's purse and fighting with my brother that I had to offer the priest, but it felt good to make these confessions and to be reassured that I wasn't naughtier than any of the other children. My brother hated going to confession and I'm quite certain it was because he was naughtier than I was. I would emerge from the little confession box feeling good, feeling relieved, and sometimes, after I had made a particularly lengthy confession, surprised at not getting shouted at by the priest. Although I haven't been for about a decade now, I still find the need to tell people my guilty little secrets. It's a strange urge, needing to share random and sometimes shameful information with others and, oddly enough, on reflection I realise that this very blog is made up of mostly my confessions.

For the moment, I have no little anecdotes to share with you. I'm still suffering from a long bout of writer's block, but I still wanted to get some things off my chest. So without further adoo, here are five random 'fess ups.

  • I'm afraid of talking to people with squint eyes because I don't know if they're actually talking to me and if they are, I never know which eye to talk back to.

  • I have trouble remembering my left and right. I have to hold out both hands and make an L shape with my thumb and index finger. The hand that makes a proper 'L' (as opposed to an inverted one) is the left.

  • When Scottish tourists ask to buy a ticket at work I often put on an Irish accent to avoid the whole 'Oh you're from Scotland too?! Fancy that! Where abouts are you from? What are you doing over here? etc, etc' conversation.

  • I am diabolical when it comes to geography. I smile and nod knowingly when colleagues tell me they come from Belarus or Laos, but really I have no idea where these countries are in the world until I come home and google them.

  • Although I'm sure they are comfy, I don't really get the concept of Crocs. I find them really, really ugly.
There. That feels much better. Thanks for listening, Blogosphere!


14 comments:

Micah D.L. said...

1. I, too, do the left/right thing. TD gets SO mad when I'm giving directions while driving by telling him to "go that way"...I feel your pain.

2. I [heart] geography and play games online to get better at it...I struggle with Africa and Eastern Europe (too many - oatia's)

3. Crocs are more for function than form, however, they have come out with cuter styles, like Mary Janes and stuff...check out the website...you might like 'em! I've always said they're the ugliest, most comfortable shoes I have ever owned (and they're made right near my hometown tee hee hee)

T.D. Newton said...

American response: What? There's a difference between Irish and Scottish accents???




HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

kiwi in france said...

CROCS are gross!!!! I think we should burn them all.

I wish I could diguise my accent (I'm terrible with accents). Being in Scotland I get asked so many questions: so are you on holiday? how long are you here for? wow you are so far from home? and my personal most hated question "so hows life in Australia?" grrrrr

Andromeda said...

I put on a really bad accent in French to avoid telemarketers and the Greenpeace people on the street, while the rest of the time I work so hard on my French I almost cry when people notice a little accent and ask where I'm from.

Considering I didn't even know Luxembourg existed until I moved within 100km of it, don't worry too much about the geography. Americans will always be the worst at it.

Lis of the North said...

I understand what you mean about cross-eyed people. I used to work with someone cross-eyed but they are on secondment in Thailand right now.
I totally get you on the whole left/right thing. I often do the navigating in the car, and Hubby and I use a system of 'your side' 'my side'. It works well. I have to look at my hands when I give someone directions in the street tho!
I love geography. I love maps. I'm a bit of a geography-trivia-geek.

Zannie said...

Me too! To all of these...well, not so much the ticket thing, since I don't give out tickets very often. This is why we are BBF's, we share the same shameful habits...which aren't really THAT bad, there are worse things we could be guilty of...murder, theft, fraud, tangerine puffy bridesmaids dresses, etc etc.

Lots of Love and Hugs from Torrance xxx

Princesse Ecossaise said...

Micah Hmmm these online geography games sound useful, where can I find them? As for the different styles of Crocs, I've only ever seen the one kind but...hang on, checking out the website...ah, no, they're still quite ugly, but I do quite like the flip flops! Anyway, I also think Ugg boots are really ugly but I own a pair of them for their comfort / warmth. Sometimes a girl just needs sensible shoes! ;-)

TD Haha that really is an American response! Do you know that the majority of 'Mericans who talk to me at work don't realise English is my first language? I'm often congratulated for speaking English so well!

Kiwi LOL, sorry for laughing, but I do sympathise with you on the whole New Zealand / Australian accent mix-up. I am always correcting people when they introduce me to someone else as 'Anglaise'. Now, I've nothing against English people, but I'm not English, I'm Scottish and it would be nice if the rest of the world actually acknowledged the difference between the two!

Andromeda haha I once put on a really bad French accent in order to get rid of a charity person in Edinburgh. The worst thing was though, it was a nun!

Lis oh thank goodness someone else understands the whole cross eyed person fear! I knew it was taking a risk putting it out there, someone somewhere will be insulted about that, but at the same time I just had to know if I was the only one! Apparently I'm not, hooray! As for the your side my side in the car thing, that's a great idea! I'm going to start trying that one!

Zannie that really is why we are BBF's! Well, one of the many reasons ;-)

By the way I still haven't chosen the bridesmaid's dresses so you never know...maybe you will end up wearing a tangerine puffy monstrosity!

(just kidding)

T.D. Newton said...

zOMG you have got to be kidding!!!! You have my personal endorsement: the next American who congratulates you for speaking English well IN FRANCE, just punch them. Please. Tell them it's from me. My god, I am embarrassed on behalf of my entire country that people would do that. The things I say are entirely in jest... I never actually expect people to be that ignorant. That'd be like me congratulating the people in Kyoto on their English. *facepalm*

Micah D.L. said...

to follow up on TDs comment, as I like to say, go ahead and "high five their face"...that is madness. sigh. americans are typically more embarrassing than i like to think. ARGH!

the crocs flips are wicked comfy...you didn't like the mary janes??? i think those are some of my faves... :)

i most assuredly adore the Uggs. they are the most wonderful dog-walking-in-the-winter-at-6am boots!

T.D. Newton said...

Hey Princesse, I just posted an essay linked to this discussion. Would love to hear your comments.

http://initialdraft.blogspot.com/2009/07/good-american-essay.html

Loth said...

Crocs: excellent for (1) beaches that are a bit pebbly because you can keep them on and walk straight into the water and (2) for beaches where there are unidentified wiggly things and slimy seaweed in the water because you can keep them on and not have your toes touch anything icky. Not excellent for ANYTHING ELSE.

Princesse Ecossaise said...

TD hahaha are you wise?! Can you imagine me biffing an American in the face at work? i just have to sit there politely and say thank you when they congratulate me on my English! The other day I had an American asking me where did I learn my English! That has to be the worst one yet!

Micah I've been thinking of getting some croc flip flops ever since you sent me to their website actually. I may be converted (slightly)! I couldn't see any Mary Jane Crocs though, do you have a pic of them?

Totally feeling you on the Uggs though! The best most comfy winter boot ever!

TD I'm onto it ;-)

Loth I have to admit that yes, Crocs could probably work well as a beach shoe but there are far too many people wearing them out and about. A colleague wore a pair of bright pink ones to work the other day, I mean that's just wrong! There should be some kind of law against that!

T.D. Newton said...

Hahahahaha like an old episode of Batman... BIFF! ZAP! POW! Sorry, that's just not a "common" word over here.

Seriously, that is just insane. If someone asks you where you learned "your English," you should ask them where they learned theirs.



Then punch them in the face.

Micah D.L. said...

Check these ones out:
http://www.crocs.com/womens-footwear/women-footwear,default,sc.html?sz=1&start=3

There are about a billion styles that are just awesome!