Monday, July 09, 2007

Girl With No Home

I’ve epilated my legs, moisturised, toned and exfoliated my skin. I’ve waxed my moustache. I’ve painted my toenails, plucked my eyebrows and realised I have a monobrow forming. I’ve written four To Do lists, I’ve packed and repacked my suitcase. I’ve sprouted a spot on my chin – typical – and I’ve studied myself in the full length mirror and have come to the conclusion that I’ve probably put on half a stone since I last saw him.

I’ve stressed myself out with what to wear on the journey, I’ve had butterflies each time I think about where I’ll be and who with by tomorrow evening. I’ve struggled over whether I should use a little bit of fake tan just to take away the terrible paleness of a Scottish girl who hasn’t seen the sun in a long, long time or if I should just listen to FP and be ‘au natural’.

I’ve tried to whiten my teeth (to no avail), I’ve tried to disguise the bags under my eyes and the big scar across my face (to no avail also). I’ve put an expensive deep condition mask on my hair and wrapped it in a hot pink towel, I’ve chosen my most sexy pairs of knickers – except the polka dot pair that FP hates but they are so comfy – and packed my three new dresses and two new pairs of jeans.

I’m moving to France!

Except I’m not.

Not yet anyway. Not like I thought.

I’ll be back in Scotland after a week for the beginning of my new treatment at the hospital.

My home now lies neither in Scotland nor in France but rather somewhere in between – (The English Channel maybe?). Still, there’s no point in complaining. I’m seeing the man of my dreams tomorrow and nothing can get me down.


read Monday Madness



Munther said...

Awright girl !!

I am happy for you two ! Good luck with everything.

But don't stop posting :)

Miss Despina said...

Oh Princesse, I sympathise and hope that the treatment goes really well for you. Don't worry, your home is not the English channel, I think you have the right to call yourself truly Frecossaise. Good luck with the monobrow and don't let anything get you down! I hope your reunion is sickeningly beautiful :) xxx

sylvie d said...

You will be perfect I am sure...enjoy your trip to France!

Anonymous said...

Have fun in France ... and good luck with the treatment ...

Ghosty said...


"An epilator is an electrical device used to remove hair by mechanically grasping multiple hairs simultaneously and pulling them out."

Oooohhhh. Ow. *Is glad to be manly and enjoys his moderate hairiness*

Enjoy your time with FP! Perhaps you could look into getting a houseboat for Channel living? ;)

sugar007 said...

I am sure FP is going to love you warts and all. Okay maybe sans the warts. Besides I heard monobrows is the new black...really!!

Just imagine the buzz you would feel after your hospital visit, when you fly back to Paris. So don't think of yourself as living halfway but as a jetsetter!!

Lis of the North said...

Oh Princesse, the packing, the making oneself beautiful, the choosing of very best undies... brings back some memories!!
Sorry to hear that you're having to return to Scotland so quickly after you'll be in France. Hopefully it will be worth it and medical science will prove itself useful!
As for not having a home, I have been living in France for ... oh eight years now, and I still call Scotland home. And where we live here is home too. I have a sort of split-personality when it comes to where home is!

Jez said...

Trust me, fake tan is never a good idea. All the women I've seen who use fake tan are varying shades of orange. Either that or they look they were locked in a walk-in microwave for ten minutes.

Enjoy this step forward into a new phase in your life. Hope myself and the good lady Despina get to meet you and FP in Frogland sometime.

Miss Despina said...

Jez looks stupid when he uses fake tan, trust me, he didn't have a bloody clue...
Is he trying to gate-crash our Audrey trip now?
Just kidding, love you babes
(you too Jez teeheeheehee)

Zhu said...

Oh I can totally relate ! I'M the same everyday I come back to Canada after a trip home, I wanna be so perfect, I really take care of all the little things (yes, the eyebrow too...). Hope you enjoy your move to France ! Even if it means going back and forth a bit... you'll still be half French ! :$

Princesse Ecossaise said...

Woooo a quick reply before I leave for the airport ^_^

@Munther thankyou! Don't worry, I'll still post. FP will be out at work and I'll be sat at the laptop trying to do some more of my dissertation so no doubt I'll be tapping away on the blog!

@Despi Ha! the reunion will be sickeningly beautiful - imagine the scene - 'as soon as she saw him amidst the crowd her face lit up. She ran forth as he folded his strong arms around her little body and inhaled the familiar scent of her perfume. The crowd parted and watched the young lovers with admiration. With one hand he gently pushed her blonde locks away from her face and smiled into her eyes as she looked up at him. Cupping her silky head he kissed her. There was rapturous applause from the crowd. The end.
Great eh?! Except 'small body' was a lie. Mine isn't small.

@Sylvie merci ma voisine! j'attends avec impatieeeeeeeeence!

@SG ahhh cheers stratford girl! You should be coming along, we can watch le tour de france together and stare at the gendarmes! :-p

@ghosty ahhh dear friend. now you know how much hell us girlies go through just to please our men. Now who is the weaker sex?! hmmmm?

House boat sounds terrifying.

@Sugar hahaha yeh man monobrows are so cool no doubt about it! Shame I plucked any traces of mine away! Yassss I like beig called a jetsetter, that's great!

@Lis ahhh the good old days eh? Well perhaps not, perhaps just the complicated days!

@Jez luckilyyyy I didn't put fake tan on after all. otherwise I would be very upset with you calling me orange. In fact I might cry and scrub my face in desperation to rid myself of the orangeness. But no. I decided to be a ghost. white. And translucent.

@despina it appears he is trying to gatecrash! Oh well, no bother, we can make the boys go watch some sort of manly sport on the telly while we get absolutley plastered ^_^

@zhu hooraaaay! I'll be half french! That's grand, I'm a very happy girl as of today!!

zoo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
zoo said...

hello, clicked and clicked and ended up at your blog.

i love the french language and i love your writing.

would it be all right to link you?

Princesse Ecossaise said...

awww mais oui bien sur zoo! I'd be honoured if you linked me ^_^ nice to see you here!

Okay, time to leave! Bye bye lovely Scotland, hello belle Paris!

Miss Despina said...

Oh, lovely Mills and Swoon writing there! And you are small so there. I hope it was that gross in reality!