Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Prude Princesse


I received an invitation by sms this morning.

“Hey [Princesse] there’s a hen night at the end of this week! A friend of mine is getting married. You’ve got to come! We are getting a male stripper – it’s going to be sooo fun!”

I snort and thank my lucky stars that I’m getting the stitches taken out of my leg that day and will be ‘too sore’ to go out.

I can’t think of anything worse than a male stripper. I mean, Janey Macoroni, honestly! I’m no prude, but really there is nothing sexy about a grown man gyrating his skinny little hips to the sound of the Village People, while writhing around in a sequined thong, covered in slick baby oil and surrounded by screaming, giggly girls who look rather hot and bothered (and drunk).

I just don’t understand what the appeal of it is.

I had a gay friend who was doing his washing at the launderette with me, when out of his pile of clean washing jumped a red thong. Not only was it a red thong, but it was leather and sparkly (I was thankful I noticed it after it had been washed). It landed on the floor with a ‘plop’.

He then proceeded to tell me about his collection of thongs he had back home; a horse thong that when pressed neighs, a Christmas themed thong that plays a jingle, and a sheep thong that baahs.

Now forgive me if you think I am being square, but men in thongs, and male strippers are downright comical. More than that, they make me cringe. And even more than that the grown women screaming and shouting ‘Show us yer lad!’ is utterly cringe worthy.

I may be old-fashioned but a good man in a pair of clean, fresh Calvin Klein tighty-whities is a billion times more sexy than a slimy male stripper covered in baby oil, writhing about and shaking his dangly bits at a crowd of weak-kneed women.

14 comments:

Celebrate Woo-Woo said...

I'm totally with you. Men in thongs is beyond not sexy; it is funny!

That said, I'd still be able to have fun getting crazy with the girls, although I would leave not the least bit aroused;>

Despina said...

Ahem, young lady, since when was this a suitable dissertation subject? But yes, I do agree!
(Obviously my waves of encouragement are futile!)

Princesse Ecossaise said...

LOL @ Despina! Yes, I know, I know...I'm taking a break!!! :-p

Princesse Ecossaise said...

P.S. Hello celebrate woo-woo (what a cool name!) Glad you agree with me on this one!

ColbyPants said...

I find strippers, and strip clubs, in general, just a little bit sad. . .

T.D. Newton said...

LOL "dangly bits"

Yeah male strippers are weird. I'm all in favor of fancier underwear but, come on, thongs?? Nothing can take away your manliness faster than butt-floss.

Princesse Ecossaise said...

Me too Tom, it's all a bit sleazy and pathetic.

Haha 'Butt-floss'!! Lovely!!

Jez said...

So you don't reckon I should take my leopard-skin and pink sequined thongs to Prague with me on Friday, then?

Sebastien said...

I feel the same way about strippers in general. A little too comical and sleazy for my tastes.

Princesse Ecossaise said...

Ah sure why not Jez? If anything it will make a wonderfully amusing blog entry over chez Despina! :-p

Ghosty said...

There are three kinds of men who wear thongs: Adonises, the socially inept and those who do not own mirrors.

After that ridiculous YouTube video I just posted, I have nothing else to say on the subject of stripping. :P

SUGAR007 said...

I agree 100%. The whole male stripper thing is cringy!! I always think the only women that like that sort of thing go the type of club,'Brian Potter' owns in 'Phoenix Nights'. Apologies in advance if I have offended anyone with that last statement :-) Making it worse is when they rub baby oil over themselves and wriggle their lower half in front of some poor lasses face. You just pray he hasn't got crabs - for her sake!!

Degenerate Despinová said...

Jez how dare make me cry with laughter when I'm pretending to work! Have you still got the one that plays the national anthem or did my dad need it back?

Princesse Ecossaise said...

"God Save Our Gracious Queeeeeen"

:-( I am disappointed in both Jez and mister Despina; they are old enough to know better!

Phoenix nights is bloody HIL-ARIOUS! Although I would never actually go there in reality (except perhaps to say hello to Paddy!)